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You may be familiar with the prayer-like song that Bob Dylan wrote in which he wishes that someone, or all of us, can “stay forever young.”

May you always be courageous

Stand upright and be strong

And may you stay…

Forever young.

It turns out that, while a youthful spirit can enrich our lives, young doesn’t always cut it in the world of big business.

Granted, there are places in corporate America where youth is valued—in sales, customer service, and perhaps in research.

But at the senior decision-making level, executives tend to see new recruits as just so many puppies.  Smart puppies.  Eager puppies.  Maybe even successor-puppies.  But puppies nonetheless, inexperienced, naïve, and unfamiliar with the sharp-elbowed realities of business culture and global capitalism.

A degree from a prestigious university can help a puppy win a job, but it doesn’t guarantee that she will quickly earn the trust of an older, more experienced boss or client.

What does it take, aside from years of experience, for a young professional to overcome this bias?

One answer?  Five languages!

The first language to master is the language of the industry you’re in.  If you’re a consultant, you have to learn multiple languages.  Mastery of language implies mastery of the thinking beneath the language.

Within industry, there are functions—finance, marketing, R&D—all of which speak their own dialect.

Then there is the language of your own company, and the language of your client companies.  Again, if you are customer-facing, you must hold your own in substantive discussions conducted in the language of the client.

The second language is the language of your own vocal presence—the signals you send through the pitch, volume, speed, and resonance of your speaking voice.

Many young people speak quickly, have less chest resonance in their sound, enunciate poorly, use filler words such as, “Like, you know, I mean,” and demonstrate tentativeness in their pitch patterns—for instance, using a rising intonation at the end of a declarative sentence.

To senior people, all of these vocal characteristics signal immaturity and naiveté, and while they can be overcome with exceptional intelligence and sterling qualities of character, they represent another strike against the young.

The third language is what you say by listening.  Few of us, at any age, are highly effective listeners, but to excel at this under-rated behavior is to enjoy a profound competitive advantage.  The reason for this?  The greatest need that people have is the need to be appreciated, and the simplest way to show appreciation is to listen.

While the other guy is talking, younger professionals (I’ve been one) are often busy thinking of what they’re going to say in order to prove their intelligence or defend their position.  Wiser, more experienced hands are working to understand, and then recognize, the thoughts and feelings of others.

The fourth language is body language.  Older executives tend to have gravitas when they speak—with words, voice, or body language.  George Schultz, former Secretary of State, is someone who comes to mind when I think of gravitas.

Gravitas evokes a sensation of stability, solidity, confidence and calmness.  Gravitas makes me think of deep, still water.

The body language of younger people often evokes sensations of quickness, flexibility, and turbulent water.

Or, put another way, whereas older people tend to move like large animals at the top of the food chain—like elephants or giraffes—younger people are closer cousins to our friends the chipmunks, squirrels, and finches.

These frisky friends are beautiful creatures, but you don’t want to trust a million-dollar project to Alvin, Rocky, and Tweety.

The fifth language:  the language of clothes and grooming.  If you wear blue jeans and T-shirts to an executive meeting within the Fortune 500, you’re probably committing a CLM (career-limiting move.)

And when you show up with a mohawk or a mullet, you’re road kill, unless you walk on water in some rare way.

These are broad claims, but they represent a broad truth.  Large business cultures are more or less like the military.  Each has officers and foot soldiers, objectives and enemies, front lines and back offices, campaigns, strategies, and tactics.

And each has a uniform—clothes and haircuts that signal that you are a member of the team.

These, in short, are the five languages we must master in order to earn the trust and respect of senior business people.  The language of:

• Industry and function
• voice
• listening
• body language
• clothes and grooming

Some are easier to learn than others.  For instance, developing your voice to make it deeper, more resonant, or less nasal takes time.  And speaking more slowly can be a confrontation with a lifetime of habit.

But anyone can learn to speak all these languages more effectively, and thereby get people to take you and your ideas more seriously.

I’m with Dylan 100%:  May you stay forever young.  But may you also climb the learning curve quickly, to bring value to yourself, and to the enterprise you serve.

Sims Wyeth is a speech coach in Montclair, NJ specializing in presentation skills and public speaking training in order to give accomplished people the knowledge and skill they need to become accomplished speakers. Learn more public speaking tips at www.SimsWyeth.com.

A quick heads up for those of you interested in all things public speaking.

Angela DeFinis of DeFinis Communications has produced a blog carnival on the topic, “The Impact of Public Speaking on Top Sales Performance.”

When you visit the site, you will find about 10 postings.  Whether you are a professional speaker, a coach, or one of the many who seek to grow personally and professionally, you will find in the diverse opinions food for thought (and action.)

My own posting is curmudgeonly.  I argue that public speaking is not the strongest choice for top sales performance.  Instead, I suggest that conversation and dialogue is more likely to help you build trusting relationships and win sales.

However, I do say that public speaking can be effective if it replicates the characteristics of good dialogue, which is the consideration of many points of view.

I urge you to vist the Public Speaking Blog Carnival and soak up all you can.

If you don’t want to talk about it, don’t put it on the slide.

Knowledgeable people in the audience notice small details and ask penetrating questions. Less knowledgeable people lob random questions to probe for weaknesses in your argument and character.

If it complicates your point, and there’s no ethical reason why the audience should know it, leave it out.

And you thought your job was to stick to the facts! Here are the Heath brothers, Chip and Dan, making a strong point about making a point in their wonderful book Made to Stick.

Nora Ephron is a screenwriter whose scripts for Silkwood, When Harry Met Sally, and Sleepless in Seattle have all been nominated for Academy Awards.  Ephron started her career as a journalist for the New York Post and Esquire.  She became a journalist because of her high school journalism teacher.

Ephron still remembers the first day of her journalism class.  Although the students had no journalism experience, they walked into their first class with a sense of what a journalist does:  A journalists gets the facts and reports them.  To get the facts, you track down the five Ws—who, what, where, when, and why.

As students sat in front of their manual typewriters, Ephron’s teacher announced the first assignment.  They would write the lead of a newspaper story.  The teacher reeled off the facts:  “Kenneth L. Peters, the principal of Beverly Hills High School, announced today that the entire high school faculty will travel to Sacramento next Thursday for a colloquium in new teaching methods.  Among the speakers will be anthropologist Margaret Mead, college president Dr. Robert Maynard Hutchins, and California governor Edmund ‘Pat’ Brown.”

The budding journalists sat at their typewriters and pecked away at the first lead of their careers.  According to Ephron, she and most of the other students produced leads that reordered the facts and condensed them into a single sentence:  “Governor Pat Brown, Margaret Mead, and Robert Maynard Hutchins will address the Beverly Hills High School Faculty Thursday in Sacramento…blah, blah, blah.”

The teacher collected the leads and scanned them rapidly.  Then he laid them aside and paused for a moment.

Finally, he said, “The lead to the story is ‘There will be no school next Thursday.”

“It was a breathtaking moment,” Ephron recalls.  “In that instant I realized that journalism was not just about regurgitating the facts but about figuring out the point.  It wasn’t enough to know the who, what, when, and where; you had to understand what it meant.  And why it mattered.’” For the rest of the year, she says, every assignment had a secret—a hidden point that the students had to figure out in order to produce a good story.

Sims Wyeth is a private speech coach in Montclair, NJ specializing in executive speech coaching and public speaking training in order to give accomplished people the knowledge and skill they need to become accomplished speakers. Learn more public speaking tips at www.SimsWyeth.com.

The Wise Presenter would do well to study how people make decisions (and how you yourself make decisions.)

Jonathan Lehrer is a Rhodes Scholar out of Columbia University, an editor at large for the science-focused Seed Magazine and the author of Proust was a Neuroscientist.  He has written for numerous publications, including his blogs at The Frontal Cortex and at his own website.    His new book is How we Decide. 

Lehrer says he is pathologically indecisive.  “It’s not uncommon for me to spend 20 minutes in the in the cereal aisle deciding between Honey Nut Cheerios and Apple Cinnamon Cheerios.”

He speaks about the assumption that human beings are rational creatures and that the “bad guys” in decision-making are the emotions. 

Apparently, when the decision is a complex one, it’s best to absorb as much information as possible and then let it seep into your unconscious for a period of time. Your intuition may be your best bet in a complicated situation.

Lehrer references case studies of people with damage to the emotional centers of their brains who become unable to make even trivial decisions.

“Rationality without emotion is a disease,” he says.

As speakers who seek to win the assent of our audiences, whether we’re in sales or leadership, research or product management,  Lehrer provides further proof that the ancient Greeks were right:  we need both intellectual and emotional appeal when trying to persuade our listeners.

Sims Wyeth is a private speech coach in Montclair, NJ specializing in executive speech coaching and public speaking training in order to give accomplished people the knowledge and skill they need to become accomplished speakers. Learn more public speaking tips at www.SimsWyeth.com.

I’ve been introduced with fanfare, and I’ve been introduced with a kind of shrug in my general direction, as if to say, “Hey Sims.  You’re on.”

I like fanfare, pomp and circumstance.  But when it’s touting my resume and puffing me up to make me look important, I’m embarrassed.  I wonder if I’m going to live up to the inflated expectations being created.

I like speakers who are capable of disguising their preparedness with a cloak of informality and spontaneity. 

For instance, I just spoke to a guy who sells software to hospitals.  His favorite presentation happened a year ago, when he was alone with the entire C-suite of a major hospital chain—just him, a whiteboard, and the senior execs. 

He was drawing pictures, constructing diagrams, and modeling their IT infrastructure on the board, all the while answering questions and learning about their business.

It was a sales call, but it was really a chalk-talk. 

This guy is a National Sales Director, so he doesn’t need a PowerPoint deck or a pitch book.  His experience gives him the ability to make it look easy.  He knows his product, their business, and how to connect with them

A sense of ease is the mark of a pro.  Watch Tom Brady or Eli Manning in the midst of battle, and they look like they’re on a stroll with their grandma. 

I’m not saying that formality doesn’t have it’s place in presenting.  But a sense of ease that puts the audience at ease is also a powerful technique.

Sims Wyeth is a private speech coach in Montclair, NJ specializing in executive speech coaching and public speaking training in order to give accomplished people the knowledge and skill they need to become accomplished speakers. Learn more public speaking tips at www.SimsWyeth.com.

Every great store has a theme.  Nordstrom’s has the theme of customer service.  Starbucks has coffee.  L.L. Bean used to be great when it stuck to its theme of outdoor clothing you could pass down to your children.

Sims Wyeth & Co is a store that sells presentation skills, and one item that some customers want to find on the shelf is PRESENCE.

So, I choose as my theme for a month the idea of PRESENCE.  What is it and how do you get it?

If you ever had the pleasure of seeing Merce Cunningham, the great dancer and choreographer, you may know what presence is.

Johnny Carson had presence, more than Dave, Jay, and Conan combined.

Bruce Springsteen has presence, even when he’s not filling a stadium with his energy.

And Roseanne Barr has presence–she radiates mischief.  Sarah Palin too, although her presence comes more from combativeness.

All of these people  have presence—a magical aura that makes them appealing to others.  We suppose they were born with it, they did nothing to cultivate it, and they didn’t have to do anything to send it our way.  It just leapt off them like light off a mirror.

I will challenge that notion for the next month, until October 15th.  I will argue that all kinds of people can have presence, that it is a multi-dimensional attribute that can be cultivated, and that it can be thrust upon all of us by the circumstances of life’s ups and downs.

So my assignment is to answer two questions:  What is presence?  And how do you get it?

Stay tuned for a month of presence.

Sims Wyeth is a private speech coach in Montclair, NJ specializing in executive speech coaching and public speaking training in order to give accomplished people the knowledge and skill they need to become accomplished speakers. Learn more public speaking tips at www.SimsWyeth.com.

Asked to describe a speech, I think most of us would say, “It’s a guy standing at a lectern on a stage reading from notes, a script, or a teleprompter.”

Asked to describe a presentation, we would say, “It’s somebody standing in front of a room with a screen behind her, where she’s showing visuals to explain something to the audience.”

So what’s the difference?

First, the similarities are pretty obvious.  Both involve one person talking to a group of people.  The people listening are sitting down, facing the speaker, and passively listening.  The person speaking is working hard to say something to the listeners, and has probably worked hard to prepare her thoughts and materials.

The first difference is that we don’t see visuals in a speech.  The speaker strives to paint a picture in the mind of the audience, but he’s doing it with words, not with images on a screen.

The next difference is the degree of formality.  Speeches are more formal than presentations.  They date back to 500 BCE and maybe even further, beyond our historical record.  Great speeches have rocked the world.  They are about (or should be) about big ideas, values, and concerns.

Presentations are more informal than speeches.  We associate them with more technical, mundane circumstances.  They have their roots in education, the military, and the practical trades, such as building and engineering.  They tend to be about facts and figures.

Speeches are given to larger crowds, and therefore must to appeal to the emotions.  The larger the crowd, the less complex the material should be.

Presentations are generally given to smaller groups, and therefore can be more detail-oriented.  The smaller group should always be given a chance to discuss the material, ask questions, and engage with the speaker.  This is not possible when thousands are listening to a speech.

Speeches are made in suits and tuxedos,  presentations in shirtsleeves and slacks.   Speeches require broad vision, whereas presentations often require a deep, narrow focus.

Speeches can be made to persuade or entertain, but not to inform.  Presentations can do all three — inform, persuade, and entertain.  Occasionally, someone gives a presentation that accomplishes all those goals simultaneously.

Just because you’re good at one, it doesn’t mean you’re good at the other.   Speechmaking is a different muscle, requiring development.   Likewise the informality and accessiblity of  presenting can be hard for those accustomed to the lectern and the teleprompter.

CEOs and thought leaders give speeches.  Managers and technical experts give presentations.  Of course this is an oversimplification, but it evokes the distinction I’m making.

Someone once said ( I forget who) that the only reason to give a speech is to change the world.  That’s a tall order, requiring the speaker to ratchet up her degreee of intention.

Presentations require clear thinking and organization, but do not often demand that the speaker light the world on fire–just throw a little light on the subject at hand.

I just came back to work after dinner, where, over roast chicken and salad, my wife began to explain to me why some people try too hard.

I felt obliged to listen, but I was also tired, and had consumed enough wine to permit myself to disengage and become impatient.  I waved my hand and said, “You’re losing me!”  She had hurt feelings.

Part of the problem was that the topic (“people who try too hard”) is a recurring interest of hers, and I automatically leapt to the conclusion that I was about to hear the same story I’ve heard for many years.

But in the spirit of full disclosure,  like many husbands, I am a selective listener.  If I’m reading, or watching TV, or thinking about something else, and my wife speaks to me, I am mindful of my tendency to listen for a split second, conclude that whatever she’s saying is not all that important, and throw up a smokescreen of grunts and nods while I turn off my ears.

This is not good for our marriage, and I sense  she has learned how to do the same thing to me–listen for a few seconds, generate a hypothesis about what I’m saying, and conclude that it’s a re-run that she doesn’t want to sit through.

One explanation for this state of affairs is that we are, in fact, repeating ourselves, (thematically if not with the exact same words) and that we are now able to predict what the other person is going to say.

Because what we are saying is predictable, we don’t pay much attention.  There’s nothing new coming out of our mouths–no new thoughts, no radical new insights–and so nothing much of interest.

We know how to fix this.  Skilled in effective dialogue, we will say to each other, “We need new thoughts, new experiences, new growth.  Let’s make it happen.”   And we will.  We will go to the theater, on trips, on vacations, engage in new activities with new people.   We will grow and prosper.

But when that’s over, we’ll have to get down to the real work: the cultivation of curiosity–about eachother–without judgment.

I can hear us talking about that now.   I will say, predictably quoting Steven Covey, “We must first seek to understand, then to be understood,” and then I predict she will roll her eyes as if to say, “Not that old chestnut!”

And then we’ll really be up against it, and have to be still–still as water–until we get curiouser and curiouser.

What do you do when your product is losing share to a new competitor and it’s time to present the annual marketing plan?

Stay positive! Acknowledge the challenges and the implication, but do so in a matter of fact manner, and move quickly to your proposed solution.

Even if you have a snowball’s chance in hell of recovering your market share, put together a plan that could work if everything were to break in your favor.

And demonstrate commitment in your choice of words, your posture, and your tone of voice. Everyone knows it’s a bad situation before you begin, so you must demonstrate belief in the possibility–however small–of success.

We are not rewarded in business for dragging problems into the board room and dumping them on the table in front of senior people. We are rewarded for being crystal clear about the situation, and giving them the best option you and your team can devise.

You are the captain of your brand. There is no honor in leaving the ship while it sinks. Your job is to fight to the end. The brand may go down, but you will be remembered for your determination and optimism in the face of dire odds.

I recently received a call from a regional sales leader who said that he was unable to express himself to senior management. 

He speaks effectively to his peers and his direct reports, but said that he has trouble organizing his thoughts when speaking to his boss’s  bosses.

I did not meet him in person, and did not try to figure out what was bothering him over the phone.  I suggested he shop around.  But I am curious.  What’s going on and what can he do about it?

What’s Going On?

Let’s speculate.

1. He’s projecting an image of harsh,  judgmental authority onto the senior leaders, which is causing him to tense up with anxiety.
2. He knows that some senior leaders have a reputation for being tough on presenters–they may use presentations as a stress test for “separating the men from the boys.”
3. He is not taking possession of his own strengths and feels like a child standing before angry parents–in a word, powerless.
4. He knows he is comfortable talking about his accounts, but lacks the ability to speak in broader terms about long-range strategic issues.
5. He can speak about his accounts, but worries about the Q&A.
6. He simply hasn’t spoken to them often enough to get comfortable in their presence.
7. He’s over-reacting.  Everyone is nervous speaking to senior leadership.  There’s much at stake.

What Can He Do about It?

1. First of all, get a basic check-up on his presentation skills–how to organize his information to appeal to his audience, and how to project himself effectively.
2. Rehearse his presentation with simulated real-world pressure.  This means getting people to sit and listen to him stumble through his first efforts.
3. Rehearse enough so that he transfers his knowledge and delivery skills from his cerebral cortex (which is good at learning new stuff) to his cerebellum (which is good at orchestrating lightning fast physical and mental tasks.)
4. Get some support from his immediate boss.  If the company believes in him, they should help him break through this challenge.
5. Get to know some of the senior leaders.  This could be difficult, but who knows what would happen if he called up one or two of them and asked them for some career guidance on how to make the presentation most useful to them.  They might see it as enterprising and thoughtful. 
6. Do some visualizing of the senior leaders as normal, fun-loving folks–people who have his best interests at heart, and who want to see him succeed.
7. Develop his self-esteem and confidence.  Read this article on bnet.com for some insights on how to do this.

It’s hard for many of us to step in front of an unfamiliar audience that we imagine knows more than we do, has more money and education than we do, more power, and in fact, could make or break us (or at least it feels that way.)

This guy was up-front and honest with me, and I respect him for that.  He’s out there trying to solve his problem–to take his skills to another level.  Actually, this is one of those instances when the word “skill” may not be the right word.  This might be more about personal growth.